Dying for Something to Live For
When Central High School students learned about the suicide of their classmate, Lori,* Kayla turned pale and sat lifeless thinking about the unopened e-mail she received from Lori yesterday. The e-mail subject line read, “Dying for something to live for.” This e-mail was Lori’s suicide letter.
Kayla and Lori had been friends since the sixth grade. At age 12 they became inseparable. One year before, something had changed with Lori. She lost interest in hanging out after school, going to the mall, the beach, and to the movies. She no longer enjoyed all the things a typical 15-year-old loved to do. She became a loner and very withdrawn. Her parents thought she was just moody and her teachers perceived her behavior as rebellious. As time passed, Lori’s laughter turned to silence and her sparkling eyes were replaced by sad ones.
Kayla begged Lori to share her feelings, but it didn’t happen. She invited Lori to sleep over, but she refused. She planned shopping trips, but Lori wouldn’t show up. When Lori did talk, her responses were negative. Lori felt everyone hated her and eventually she started to hate herself. Lori felt hopeless, and Kayla felt helpless.
What was wrong with Lori? Have you ever felt like the simplest things in life are extremely difficult? Have you ever felt that you are the only one feeling this way, therefore how can you open up and ask for help? This is exactly what Lori suffered on a daily basis. What no one knew was that Lori was experiencing depression. This feeling was different than she had ever known and she didn’t know how to change it or how to ask for help. To numb the emotional pain from the depression she started abusing herself physically by using her eraser to make marks so deeply on her arms and fingers that it drew blood. She then went to cutting herself with a blade.
Lori was not alone. You are not alone. Did you know that about 5 percent of teens in the general population suffers from depression at any given point in time? Teen depression is a very serious issue and if not recognized and treated it can lead to terrible consequences, such as social isolation, low self-esteem, drug and/or alcohol abuse, and even suicide. Teen depression can be misdiagnosed as a bad mood, hormonal changes, sadness, or rebellion. If you or someone you love have one or more of these signs of depression and they don’t go away, seek help. Someone will understand your feelings even if they haven’t experienced depression.
Remember, if the signs persist, then you insist. Seek help!
Signs associated with teen depression:
• Feeling sad about everything
• Not caring about anything, boredom, and lack of motivation to try new things
• Social isolation
• Low self-esteem
• Increased irritability, anger, or hostility
• Frequent absences from school, or poor academic performance
• Thoughts or expressions of suicide or self-destructive behavior
Teenagers experience strong feelings because of stress, confusion, self-doubt, and pressure to do well in sports and academics, and also family issues such as divorce, stepparents, stepsiblings, or moving to a new environment. Depression can develop from these situations. Teens may be afraid to talk about it, but will bring attention to themselves by acting out and causing trouble in school, or at home. Some use drugs to hide from their fears, and others commit suicide to escape.
Suicide is the third-leading cause of death of 15- to 24-year olds. Statistics show one in five teens have considered attempting suicide. More than one in six has made plans to attempt suicide and more than one in 12 have made a suicide attempt in the past year. Suicidal feelings and depression have similar symptoms and both are treatable.
Suicide warning signs:
• Talking about suicide or death
• Talking about feeling hopeless or feeling guilty
• Isolation
• Self-destructive behavior
• Saying things like “It would be better if I wasn’t here”
• A sudden, unexpected switch from being very sad to appearing to be happy
• Visiting or calling people to say goodbye
Most teens who commit or attempt suicide have given some type of warning. It’s important to be aware of these potential warning signs. If you know of someone who fits this description the best thing to do is keep the line of communication open and tell an adult.
*Not her real name
In an emergency, call: 1 (800) SUICIDE.
A family physician, private therapist, or counselor.
Community mental health agency.
A suicide prevention or crisis center.
For more information, not professional advice,
check out: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/suicide_prevention.htm
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